A Whisper in a Crowd

The other day in class, we talked about what we would put in our will if we had to write it. In the book we're reading, The Martian by Andy Weir, he is stuck on mars with a high probability of dying before help reaches him, there is a part in the book, where he is finally in communication with the rest of his crew, and he asks his best friend Martinez "If I die, I need you to check on my parents. They'll want to hear about our time on Mars firsthand...I'm not giving up. Just planning for every outcome" (Weir, 192). This line really got me thinking, it's such a heavy subject but after a while, I knew what I would choose to say. I would say thank you to everyone that has impacted my life for the better, the ones who taught me lessons, as well as the ones who supported me through everything. New friends, old friends, and family. I wouldn't be who I am today without them, and I just want them to know how grateful I am. A couple years ago, a teacher of mine wa

I decided today I would ramble on about my day. Well, technically from last night to this evening. Last night, I watched Jeopardy, then I saw the U.S.  women's free skate, and finally, finished the night off with the X Games . What a lot of people don't know about me, is that I love to watch competition shows, they are basically the only shows I really watch. Last summer Olympics , I did 100 crunches every night that it was on. Competitions like these really bring out motivation in myself. When I see other people doing these amazing tricks and showcasing their tremendous amount of talent, I want that to be me. After watching some of the X Games, because it was on until 12:35 am, I went to sleep at 12:00. When I woke up this morning at around 12:30 pm, I ate some Cocoa Pebbles cereal, while watching a video about thrifting on my phone. When I finished my breakfast, I wanted to start writing a blog post but instead played The Sims for an hour. Next, I began a show called “Ry

On Friday, I picked up my prom dress from being hemmed. When I tried it on, I smiled from ear to ear. I haven't always felt that way in the clothes, that I wear. While trying my dress on, I realized that I have come a long way. When I was younger, I used to feel uncomfortable in all of my clothes, except for a pink pair of gaucho pants; ridiculous, I know. I went to therapy for it and everything, I have always had a love-hate-relationship with clothes. The first time I wore a pair of jeans to school, let alone a full day, was probably 9th grade. Now, jeans are my favorite thing to wear. It makes me so happy to have overcome my poor relationship with clothes. Whenever I go to clothing stores now, I adore trying clothes on and enjoy wearing them. I don't think I have really enjoyed putting together outfits until high school.  I think the problem started in I was in elementary school when my teacher told my mom that I couldn't wear dresses to school every day, especially in

While thinking of what to write today, I started a shuffle on my playlist. The first song that began playing was "Comfort Crowd" by Conan Gray. This had me thinking about how, when you're lonely, the silence messes with your head. In the beginning, it starts with “Begging on my knees, screaming ‘Someone come and help me…", then continues into “But by the time they’re there I’ve already hidden the body." This shows how when all you have is yourself, you can spiral and do things you might not normally do in your right frame of mind. Being alone gives you time to think, then you start to overthink. Overthinking leads you to act on your thoughts. In this case, it's taking someone's life, but that is just an exaggeration for how you're not yourself without your comfort crowd.  This led me to listen to more of Conan Gray's discography, a few days ago, he came out with "The Story". This song was about repressing parts of yourself in fear th

In a time of social media, there is an influx of information posted online. Sometimes, these sites are the only place people get news. A majority of the time, they are unreliable. The other day my mother came downstairs to tell me that she got an email that Pat Sajak had died because we are avid Wheel of Fortune watchers. However, I knew that was not the case because I read an interview that said that Pat was planning on returning to The Wheel of Fortune in late January, early February. A lot of people read things once and take them as the truth, but the truth is, most of the time, it isn't. I have a firm belief that you should fact check everything you read on social media networking sites with reliable sources like the newspaper, news websites, and interviews with the people involved. One person who believes in a false piece of knowledge can lead to them telling others, and that will lead to a long chain of misinformation; this is how cults and religions start.  People belie

Over the weekend, I started a new show on Netflix called The Circle. Originally I started it because I thought it would be so terrible that it's entertaining. It is a program about eight personalities competing to win one hundred thousand dollars by being liked on a voice-activated social media platform specifically made for the show called The Circle, which is similar to Tinder. Some of the contestants are participating as a catfish. T he idea sounds absurd; why condone and reward people for being like on a platform, especially when they aren't competing as themselves. At first, while watching the show, I was laughing at how ridiculous some of the characters were; but halfway through the first episode, I started to get invested in them, whether it be a love or hate relationship.  It made me think about how television can influence its viewers by having them bond with personalities in a program. It can make moldable spectators think that being a catfish is alri

Lately I have been thinking of the process of creating a band. I have been singing my entire life, much to my parents dismay. I am passionate about music. More passionate than someone who has never trained a day in their life should be. A day without music is like a day without food. It helps me relax after a stressful day and express my emotions without speaking words myself. The other day I told my dad that I was contemplating creating a band in college. He told me that he had also wanted to be in a band in high school. My dad is one of the people who shaped my love for music. He taught me Johnny Cash, Bruce Springsteen, Elvis Presley, Queen, AC/DC, etc. We’d listen to music together loud enough to burst our eardrums over a long period of time. It became my religion. I practiced listening to music everyday. So many people start bands for fun and succeed, so why can’t I.  It may be a crazy idea that I haven’t fully thought out. But it’s an idea I want to